Reclaiming Ourselves From The Scroll My 16 year old daughter called out to me from across the room. “Hey mom.”  I barely looked up from my phone. Another intriguing reel was on Instagram. “Hmmm?” “Mom, you’re really scaring me.” I finally looked up. Her forehead was wrinkled. “You’re always on your phone.” With eyes glazed over, I recalled how the tables had turned. During the pandemic, it was I who kept telling her to get off the phone. ‘I can literally see the damage it’s causing. It’s not doing you any good,’ I’d tell her several times a day. I looked at the phone in my hand. It was hard to put it down and be in the moment.  “You’re right,” I said, putting the phone face down on the sofa. I had to be honest with my daughter.  “I don’t know how this happened, but I’m addicted to scrolling. I feel like it happened so suddenly. I think it’s not only because it’s entertaining. It’s because it’s distracting and I’m scared.” “Scared of what?” “Of everything. Of making the wrong decisions, of facing the world, of not having enough money or time left, of going into work and not doing what I really feel I’m meant to do. Scared that I never get a moment’s rest from the thoughts that constantly plague me. The thoughts never stop. Scrolling makes those thoughts stop. Even if just for a while.” “Me too,” she said.  “The worst thing is, I feel my vocabulary and my memory slipping. I feel the fragmentation of my brain. I can’t focus anymore. I haven’t even read a book for the sheer pleasure of it in ages and when I try, I turn on the TV instead. I’ve stopped writing. I know it’s the phone.” She came and sat beside me and we sighed.  “Sometimes I wish I were a teenager in the eighties like you were,” she said. “Can’t lie. It was great.” We sighed again and then I made the decision to wean myself off the phone. It was getting ridiculous. I regarded my phone as if it held all the answers. I did some research on what the scrolling is really doing to us (yes, it is messing with our minds, our moods and our moments). The Sneaky Effects of Too Much Screen Time Phones are amazing, don’t get me wrong. They connect us, inform us, entertain us — sometimes all at once. But when we spend hours glued to our screens, something starts to shift. Here’s what I’ve noticed (and maybe you have too): We ’ re more distracted.  Ever try to read a book or even watch a show without picking up your phone "just for a second"? That second turns into 20 minutes of TikTok rabbit holes and Instagram rabbit trails. We ’ re more anxious.  Constant notifications keep our nervous systems on high alert. Even when we’re not getting a message, we’re checking — just in case. That “just in case” is costing us our peace. We ’ re comparing ourselves.  Social media is a highlight reel, and when we spend hours looking at other people’s best moments, it’s easy to feel like we’re falling short — even when we’re doing okay. We ’ re missing out.  Not on trends, but on  life . On real conversations. On nature. On the chance to sit in silence and actually  feel  what we’re feeling. So, What Can We Do? It would not be possible for most of us to live in a phone free world, but we need space. Space to breathe. Space to think. Space to be. Here are a few things that have helped me — and might help you too: 1. Start Your Day Screen-Free Try not to reach for your phone first thing. Stretch. Breathe. Journal. Sip something warm. Let your own voice be the first one you hear. 2. Use “ Do Not Disturb” Like a Boss Set time boundaries. I have “Do Not Disturb” set from 9 p.m. to 9 a.m., and guess what? The world doesn’t end. I sleep better, and I wake up calmer. 3. Unfollow and Mute Generously If someone’s posts make you feel less-than or anxious, unfollow or mute them. You’re in charge of your feed. Make it a space that inspires, not drains. 4. Set Screen Limits Most phones now track your screen time. Use that info. Set limits on apps. Challenge yourself to cut it back a bit each week. Even 15 minutes less a day adds up. 5. Relearn Boredom We’ve forgotten how to just  be . Remember staring out the window as a kid? Try that again. Let your mind wander. That’s where creativity lives. 6. Plug Into Real Life Go for walks. Call a friend instead of texting. Cook something from scratch. Talk to the people in your home. These moments are where the good stuff is. I’m still learning to unplug, but I’m getting a little better. I am now more aware that when I pick up the phone for no reason but to scroll, it’s to subdue the uneasiness I feel when I’m about to tackle something hard, or do a task I’ve procrastinated on, or when I’m bored. Mindfulness (really being in the present) is harder when the feelings are uncomfortable. Plus let’s face it, relationships take work and I mean all relationships, from the ones with your family, to friends and co-workers. It means making plans, getting ready, having conversations, dealing with different personalities. Sometimes it’s easier to sit alone scrolling, feeling like we are connecting but we’re not. True connection doesn’t come through a screen. I’m pushing myself to make and keep plans with loved ones. When I’m around people, I put my phone away so that I can’t see it.  Then, last week I went to the library.  “Look what I did!” I said excitedly, showing a book to my daughter. “I did something for the sheer pleasure of it, something I used to do all the time and it gave me such joy. I went to the library and borrowed a book. I’m not even going to look at my phone tonight.” One week later, she came home from school and showed me a book. “I took a page out of your  book, mom. I went to the library and borrowed this. Can’t wait to read it.”

M. Joy Magnus The Partners For Youth (PFY) family is heartbroken by the loss of our incredible board member and secretary Joy. Her passion and dedication inspired us all. We will forever cherish her memory and the impact she had on our work.  Sending love and support to her family and friends. T he PFY Board Directors

Our Chairman, Carson "Eddy" Edwards won the Commissioner seat 4 in the Miramar municipal elections on March 11th. We wish him all the best in serving the residents of Miramar. He is one of the best and will have a positive Impact on the City of Miramar and its residents. Commissioner Carson Eddy Edwards Commissioner Elect Carson Eddy Edwards Swearing In Here is what Eddy had to say: "Thank You, Miramar! Excited to Serve You I am truly humbled and honored to have earned your trust as your next Miramar City Commissioner for Seat 4. This victory belongs to all of us—the residents, families, and businesses who believe in a stronger, united Miramar. Your support, your votes, and your voices made this possible. This is just the beginning. I am committed to serving every resident and every business, ensuring transparency, accessibility, and action on the issues that matter most. Let’s move forward together. If you ever need to reach me, I will always be here to listen and work for you. Thank you, Miramar! Let’s get to work!" With gratitude, Carson "Eddy" Edwards Miramar City Commissioner, Seat 4

Someone told me a long time ago that when dealing with this world of cancel culture and social media, it is best to not write anything that can upset anyone and that means staying far away from politics. This is not a political blog. It’s just that I’m having trouble breathing these days. Scrolling through social media is like scrolling through a landmine of fear, hate and divisiveness, littered with the trivial, the mundane and consumerism. Young, old, and in between are affected by decisions our leaders make and sometimes we have absolutely no control over the decisions being made around us. The relationship between the US and Canadian governments is strained. From my doom scrolling on social media, I’ve read that some Canadians wouldn’t mind Canada becoming the 51st state. Others say ‘never' and that this is highly unlikely, but history shows us that the most unimaginable events are possible.  I remember when I was learning about Canadian history and the war of 1812, I used to think that since this happened in the past, it could happen again.  My imagination would take me on a frightening journey of this possible war, wondering how we would navigate such an event, since many of us have friends and family on both sides of the border. Without going into the long and detailed history of the war of 1812 between the US and Britain (which included Canada), the US invaded Canada several times. Interestingly, the origins of this war started with the conflict in Europe that caused Britain to adopt measures that angered the United States.   At the time that I was learning about Canadian history, I was teaching English to newcomers. Many of my students were refugees. I remember wondering, “what if something unimaginable happened like a war between the US and Canada and we became refugees? Where would we go or be sent? How would it be to start over in a country where maybe we didn’t speak the language and couldn’t get jobs to provide for our families? Would my family even survive such an ordeal?” I looked around my classroom at my students. They didn’t control the events that led them to refugee status. Voting didn’t matter. Standing up and making your voice heard didn’t matter. The leaders in power dictated the course of history. If it happened there, it could happen here. If it already happened in 1812, it could happen again. This doesn’t mean one shouldn’t vote, be an active participant in one’s community and try to make the world a better place. It means that sometimes we really have no control over the decisions that are being made around us. It means that when we agonize over what might happen and what seems to be happening, our bodies go into a state of fear (the fight, flight or freeze response) and it leaves us exhausted. Yes, we are affected by tariffs, job losses, economic instability and the possibility that the world as we know it might change drastically. At the same time, we have to look after ourselves more than ever. Stress physically affects the body with headaches, muscle pain, chest pain, fatigue, stomach upsets, sleep problems and getting sick due to weaker immune systems. Stress also affect us mentally with anxiety, lack of focus and motivation, memory problems, feeling overwhelmed, anger and sadness or depression.   I’m not saying we should ignore the news, nor stop standing up for causes important to us. I’m saying guard where your attention goes. Find time to socialize in person with friends and family. Do things you love. Continue to live, improving your skill set and employability. Pretend you live in a world where smart phones don’t exist for at least a few hours a day. Go outside. Walk. Hike. Run. Play cards. Sew. Sail. Scuba dive. Write poetry. Build a train set. Make a new recipe. Connect with friends. What I’m saying is, live . Live like today is the only day you’ve got.

I love making New Year’s Resolutions. There is a part of me that truly believes that in 365 days, I could be a brand new person, a person who has cast off all the bad habits and ways of living in the previous year and embrace a completely new me. I look at the coming months on the blank calendar and imagine how many days I’ll go to the gym, drink more water, earn more money, write more, and be present more, so that by the end of the year, I’ll have accomplished everything. Every single thing. My old habits of procrastination and sometimes sloth-like behaviour will have disappeared, the old fears completely replaced by this courageous new person. Me!  I came close to this during lockdown. When the world was shut-in and I was forced to be quiet, I had time to slow down and think. My husband and I cooked healthy meals. I started exercising and was sticking to the regime. I healed an injured shoulder by consistently doing online physiotherapy. I thought I had the answer. Just do it. It will eventually become a habit once the systems are in place. I even did a talk to youth about setting goals. A young woman asked me: what if I just can’t seem to exercise? I talked about accountability - having a friend check in. I talked about overcoming inertia - just start. How I wish I could go back to that young woman and tell her I only had half the story.  I wish I could tell that young woman that I thrived during the peace and quiet of lockdown, that all was well before my husband got laid off and once that happened, I abandoned exercise and sat in bed most nights eating caramel coated popcorn and watching Netflix. I wish I could tell her that the myth of three weeks for a new habit to form is just a myth and that for some people it’s six months or even a year. I wish I could also tell her that our brains are wired to stay put and to stay safe. When we decide to embark on any new venture, there may be excitement and an earnest desire to go for it, but there is also the brain sneaking in messages like: “It’s too much trouble. It won’t work. It will be too hard. You will probably fail.”  It is January  2025. I have the exact same resolutions I’ve had since last year. As a matter of fact, my resolutions haven’t changed much since my twenties. I know this because I have stacks of diaries dating back to the 1990s. On one hand, it could appear that I have completely failed in my endeavours. On the other hand, it shows what I want has remained more or less the same and I’m striving for the same things. Sometimes progress is slow. It can take a lifetime. For as long as I can, I’ll never stop trying. It will always be a goal to exercise more, to eat better and for me, to write more. If I could reach that young woman, I’d tell her to write down her goals. Some days, she’ll succeed and some days, she won’t. Either way, it’s okay. Labelling ourselves as lazy, a procrastinator or even sloth-like as I did is unhelpful and untrue. The body needs time to recharge. Recharge in your own way. I’d tell her to trick the brain and not go all out at once. If the goal is to walk every day, start by walking for ten minutes, not two hours. If the goal is to write a book, don’t even think about the finished product - just think about one short paragraph. If it’s to eat healthy, celebrate each time you make a good choice. The key here is not to guilt ourselves for our failures, but to focus on our successes.  As I turn my focus to the coming new year and looking at the empty calendar squares, I am making the same resolutions to exercise and write as I have always done. Maybe this will be the year that I stick to them. One thing is for sure - I’ll never stop trying.

When we’re young and if we’re lucky, an adult may come into our lives who changes the trajectory of our path for the better. One of these people for me and my highschool friends was a man called Peter Young. We met him because a group of us were not doing well in Accounting. The teacher didn’t seem to be able to impart her knowledge to us and she was often absent. My father said he knew a smart man and he’d ask him to tutor us. Back then, we were preparing for what is known as the CXC exam, formerly known as O’ levels.  We knew at once that Mr. Young was different. For one, he treated us like we were actual people (meaning he didn’t judge, discipline, reprimand, scold, berate, warn or make us feel inadequate for not knowing the material). His words emboldened us rather than frightened or restricted us. This was so long ago that I can’t remember what we actually talked about except that when we left his place, we were light-hearted and ready to take on not only Accounting, but the world. We believed we would pass Accounting and we believed we handle this confusing thing called life. We offered up our teenage problems and he guided us. He shared his life stories and we, enraptured, listened intently. He offered us a small glass of red wine each and told us that we could master anything we put our minds to. My friend Jo told me that Mr. Young was the only person in her life that made her feel worthy and capable. He was the only person who made her feel smart and good enough. For me, he made me feel that I didn’t have to be afraid of the numbers that swam before my eyes. All we had to do, he said, was, “RTFQ!” If we did this, we could solve anything. To this day, I remember RTFQ. READ THE F…. QUESTION. Read the full/f…king question! We laughed gleefully, but he was serious. If you don’t focus on the full question, you’ll miss important details. Take your time, don’t rush it, read it in full, answer thoughtfully. And when our minds jumped from conversation to conversation, from the lesson we were supposed to be learning to the social, he’d gently pull us back to the task at hand.  We never wanted to miss these tutoring sessions, what we call in Jamaica extra lessons.  Our time with Mr. Young was too precious and valuable. When we took our CXC Accounting exams, we passed with flying colors. It was at 16 that the thought came into my head: “What if I’m not really dumb at math and numbers? What if everyone just needs the right teacher?” I’ve held on to this belief in my adult life as a parent and a former English as a Second Language teacher, setting the stage for learning, by instilling the mantra: you can do it. Of course you can. If one way isn’t working, try another way, another method, another teacher. And as always, remember RTFQ! Mr. Young is at the forefront of my mind right now. My Aunt D told me Mr. Young wasn’t doing so well. He was in hospital in Jamaica. I was visiting Jamaica and wanted to see him, even if he wasn’t responsive. I had to wait though, as I had caught Covid and was waiting for a negative test. Unfortunately, it was too late. Mr. Young died on Monday morning, July 15, 2024.  My aunt called to tell me. I immediately called Jo. Since I’d left Jamaica over 20 years ago and hadn’t seen Mr. Young in a long time, I remember him as young, vibrant, with that welcoming smile that put you at ease. I was 16 again in his house, laughing and learning while his five-year-old son watched from the hallway. As I sobbed into the phone, Jo reminded me that Mr. Young lived a good long life. She had kept in touch with him all these years. He always sent bananas for her, especially when she was sick. I felt sad that immigration takes one away from all that is familiar and comforting, takes us away from the people who we love the most and the landscape that’s most familiar. I cried for roads not taken, yet felt solace that I had Jo with me to reminisce, to fill in the gaps, and to reflect and ultimately recover. The lessons Mr. Young imparted would remain a part of us, shaping us into the adults and mothers we are today: resilient in the face of life’s challenges.  In this fast paced life, RTFQ applies even when the situation is not a question. I was in Jamaica, sunburnt like never before. My skin was cracked and crinkled like an alligator. I sent my daughter to the pharmacy to buy a good moisturizing lotion. She came back with a bottle and for days we rubbed it into our skin wondering why it was so thick and pasty and hard to apply. As my skin got dryer and dryer, I decided to take a good look at the bottle. Turns out all this time, we’d been rubbing body wash into our already dry and damaged skin.  “But the woman in the pharmacy said everything on this shelf is lotion and Auntie examined it too,” said my daughter in surprise. “I guess I  should have looked at it more closely to make sure.” “Yes, we all should have, I said looking at my damaged skin. “In this case, nobody paid attention to the details. No one applied RTFQ!!”  Peta-Gaye Nash

I walked past my 15-year-old daughter’s bedroom and put my ear to the door, listening to the music that pounded from within. She usually wore airpods so this was unusual. I stood by the door listening to the lyrics and then barged in. “What is that you’re listening to? It’s awful,” I said. “My music,” she shrugged, barely looking up from her phone.  “That could never be called music! It’s horrible, talking about people’s body parts like that! How can you listen to that slackness?” As she shrugged again and I walked away, a memory hit me with such intensity, that my current life melted away and there I was again, in my twenties, backpacking around Australia. I was visiting Cairns and had met some older Jamaicans who had migrated there in the seventies. They were hungry for news of Jamaica - wanted to know what had changed - what remained the same. They asked a question that I’ve never forgotten.  “Do people still listen to that awful man?”  I had no idea who ‘that awful man’ was until they said Bob Marley. They shook their heads in disgust and their lips puckered like they’d eaten something sour.  “Yes,” I answered. “Everyone listens to Bob Marley, but he’s more chill and mellow. My generation listens to something called dance hall.”  I was thinking what they would think of dance hall music and artists like Super Cat, Bounty Killer, and Buju Banton if they thought Bob Marley’s music was awful. These older Jamaican-Australians shook their heads uncomprehendingly.  Back then, I thought their dislike had more to do with our colonial upbringing where emulating the Anglo part of our culture was better than the Afro. I thought that Bob Marley’s dreadlocks and his embracement of black power was the real reason behind their dislike. Maybe some of that is true. But here I was in 2024 doing the same thing -  criticizing my children’s music - something I said I would never  do.  I remember back in the eighties when I lived in Orlando, Florida and my father would come into the family room where our eyes were glued to MTV.  “Turn off that crap,” he’d say, “and go do something constructive.” He thought MTV was going to scar us for life. Further back, rock n’ roll was considered the music of the devil. I pondered two questions: does music actually get worse with time? What happens to us as we get older that we dislike newer music?  I consulted ChatGPT (Artificial Intelligence because we can do that now) to get some answers.  Chat GPT gave 6 reasons why older people dislike the music of younger generations.  The first one is nostalgia and familiarity - we like what is familiar and what we grew up with.  Second, we have cognitive biases. Some say as we get older, our brains get less flexible in processing new patterns and sounds. This cognitive rigidity makes it harder to enjoy new musical styles.  The third is cultural identity and generational differences. Newer music may be seen as a departure from values and norms of the previous generation. Some of these cultural shifts are harder for older people to relate to. (Personally, I can’t relate to music with lyrics that talk about women’s private parts and the sexual act. Having said that, my daughter says the dance hall of my generation is no different.)  Fourth are changes in music production and consumption giving rise to new sounds and production techniques. It can sound jarring to our ears. The way music is consumed with streaming services and social media platforms may also seem alien to older generations. Fifth is selective exposure. It is normal for us to listen to what we like and avoid the unfamiliar. Our exposure to new music is limited.  And finally, number six is perceived decline in quality. Older people believe that modern music lacks the artistry, complexity or emotional depth of the music with which they grew up. Music has indeed changed with digital effects and production techniques.  ChatGPT says these reasons are emotional, psychological and cultural.  I would like to see the day when my children are criticizing the music of their children. With the way Artificial Intelligence is exploding, my not-yet-born grandchildren will probably be listening to AI-generated music. This music may be even more alien to me but I suppose everything is a cycle and everything has its time.  A few days later, we were at a family gathering. Louis Armstrong played softly in the background. One of the elders looked up and said, “now this is music. This is real music, not like the awful stuff they play today.” “Who is Louis Armstrong?” Asked one of the youth.

We are happy to announce our second Anthony and Marcia Baker Scholarship recipient-Serena Mair. Serena reflects on her childhood "Along the shores of Treasure Beach, St. Elizabeth, one of Jamaica’s 14 parishes, the annual parade of art enthusiasts swamps the streets. Huddled together, they anticipate the countless hours of spoken word the literary festival has to offer. Here, I spent my childhood summers obsessing over the complex ideals of poetry whilst attempting to create sandcastles from the rough, exfoliating grains of the parish’s black sand. As the sunshine sought its end and windy, rainy days overtook the island, the words that were once poetic became theatrical, my sandcastle fascination replaced with backstage visits. For months, the back row of chilly theaters was my library, the actors my father directed the characters to their own story, one that would spark mine" Pertaining to the scholarship: “I am an incoming honors freshman at Nova Southeastern University double majoring in Medical Humanities and Public Health with an Experiential Leadership minor. As a scholarship recipient within my institution's leadership department and an early admit into the Dr. Kiran C. Patel College of Osteopathic Medicine's Master's in Public Health Degree Program, I hold a keen interest in women's health and aim to utilize my writing skills to improve black maternal health to lower mortality rates. I aspire to research in the academia setting to better understand the impact of cultural practices and the gender bias in biomedical sciences on the postpartum conditions of black women. With aspirations to engage in undergraduate women's and public health research, the Anthony and Marcia Baker scholarship allows me the ability to better enhance my collegiate education without the financial constraints of tuition costs. Additionally, as a 2024 recipient, I look forward to giving back to my South Floridian community by starting a nonprofit organization dedicated to advancing the health and legal support of minority women facing medical malpractice. As a Jamaican poet, the Partners for Youth Foundation opens paths for me to write not from mere fiction and imagination, but to write fonts of change, virtue, and integrity with the quill of justice and the ink of the law.”

We are happy to announce our first 2024 Anthony & Marcia Baker Scholarship recipient. Iyannah Jones is one of the two  Anthony & Marcia Baker scholarship recipients for 2024 and says "I believe in the power of education and it's abilities to decrease mental health issues and promote understanding and acceptance because knowledge is power. I advocate for integrating mental health into the academic curriculum" Referring to the scholarship award she says "I am a first generation student coming from a single household family and will be attending an out of state HBCU. Being awarded this scholarship means the world to me because it’s one step closer to not having financial anxiety. I’ve been having doubts about how I will pay for the summer program and then a separate fee for the tuition but after finding out I was awarded this scholarship, I can sleep comfortably" Congratulations Iyannah!

The inaugural DAD Dash 5K run/walk on Saturday June 8th at Vista View Park in Davie, Florida, was a huge success. The event celebrated fatherhood, the embodiment of togetherness, and health. The DAD Dash event was more than another 5K run/walk; it was an homage to dads of every name: Dad, Grandpa, Pops, Bonus Dad, bolstered by camaraderie and purpose. This event marked the prelude to Father's Day weekend, enveloping all in its embrace of vitality and joy. We want to thank everyone who worked so hard in making this inaugural DAD Dash 5K run/walk such a huge success. We now turn our attention to 2025 where we expect this tribute to fathers to be even bigger and better, stay tuned.

We are happy to welcome Peta-Gaye Nash to the Partners For Youth of South Florida website and blog. Peta-Gaye Nash was born in Kingston, Jamaica, and has made Mississauga, Ontario home for over twenty years. She is the author of a collection of short adult fiction, I Too Hear the Drums, recently a collection of short stories titled Told Ya!, and seven children’s books, all available on Amazon.com. Her latest children’s book Bushyhead, is about empowerment, self-acceptance, gratitude, and compassion. Peta-Gaye’s short stories and poems have appeared in several anthologies and she blogs on her website petagayenash.com about all manner of things, especially personal growth and self-help. In 2015, she won the Mississauga Marty Awards for Emerging Literary Art. She has also won two Observer Literary Awards in her hometown, Kingston, Jamaica. Peta-Gaye teaches English as a Second Language to newcomers to Canada at Malton Neighbourhood Services.

Welcome to the Inaugural Dad Dash 5K Run/Walk sponsorship opportunity from Partners for Youth South Florida (PFYSF) Foundation. I am thrilled to present this event in collaboration with DAD-Ease. Our foundation, with over 35 years of unwavering commitment to ensuring the healthy development of youth, is honored to partner with a company like DAD-Ease that shares our dedication to supporting fathers and families. Your interest in becoming a sponsor for the Dad Dash event signifies your commitment to making a real impact in our community. Your generous support will not only help us create a memorable experience for all participants but also contribute to our shared mission of empowering families and fostering positive relationships between fathers and their children. As an avid runner, the Chairman of PFYSF Foundation, and my most important role in life, Dad, I want to express my gratitude and excitement for considering this sponsorship opportunity. Your involvement will play a significant role in the success of the Dad Dash event and enable us to continue our vital work in empowering youth and families in South Florida. Please take the time to review the sponsorship packet provided below. It contains detailed information about the various sponsorship levels, benefits, and opportunities available for your consideration when it is convenient for you to do so. And, of course, reach out to us with any questions or to discuss how we can tailor a sponsorship package to best suit your needs and objectives. We can be reached at info@partnersforyouthfoundation.com or call +1.954.408.3841. We are excited about the potential of this partnership and look forward to the positive impact we can create together through the Dad Dash event. Your support means the world to us, and we are genuinely grateful for your consideration. Warm regards, Eddy Eddy Edwards, Chairman Partners for Youth South Florida Updated 05.09.2024: Sign up to join this even here.